Just like my previous post, there’s plenty of stuff to write about, and I’m not entirely sure which one to go with. Guess I ought to start with my Monday morning. That would make sense, right?
It’s been gray and dreary for the last few days, but this morning, I got to wake up to a nice blue sky. I hadn’t set my alarms, too, so it was a smooth awakening. It’s been a good day so far. That said, last Saturday didn’t have a good morning, and I feel it’s necessary to talk about it, because, with me and my shitty memory, it’s so easy to forget the good stuff in bad moments, and the bad stuff in the good moments.
Saturday started off okay, but since I’ve been doing my so-called clicktivism, I’ve been gradually exposing myself to the endless bullshit that this world has to offer, and what I saw that morning was just the tip of the accumulated iceberg. It’s not even a humongous deal, and I doubt that the person affiliated to that thing that I saw intended for me to see that, but it’s exactly the kind of bullshit that goes on in the lives of people that I absolutely need them not to believe. Because, for one, it’s bullshit, and two, it’s destructive bullshit. I would track down whatever it was just to share it with you, but I don’t like to spread bullshit. I do remember what it is, an article by Ben Shapiro (whoever the fuck that is) about “what feminism is actually like” and according to him, it isn’t about the 500,000 people who rallied with pussyhats, it’s about two women who refused to wear hijabs in a competition, despite being insisted upon by the regulators.
Now, not to say that what he deems feminism isn’t also applicable, but to mansplain all over an article that literally is about people telling women what to do and what not to do is fucking hypocrisy to me. Who the motherfuck is Ben Shapiro, and what does he know about the 500,000 and so many fucking more people that are actually feminists? I honestly don’t give a fuck about him, but I give a fuck about the people that might fall into his bullshit. Sad to say, one of them is a relative.
So after I ranted about it to Sylvester, God Bless his Soul, I just got into this nice depressive funk that I really did not need because I’d just finished telling him that me getting mad at this shit would not “stress” me out, and even if it did, I’m not a fucking Golden Child that should not be touched by stress fucking ever. I was spiraling lower and deeper into that black hole, and in an effort to prove all the assholes wrong, because I am the most stubborn person I know, I told my brain to shut the fuck up. I logged out of the Facebook app, and I watched vlogs on YouTube, which I found did wonders for me. Thank goodness for vlogs.
And since then, after I check the feed, I would log out of the app, because it can be quite toxic. I’m not sure it’s good in general because I don’t agree with censoring anything. I want to see what they see so that I know what to address. But at times it pushes me to the edge, so I need to moderate myself. See? I know my shit.
I gotta say, I’m pretty happy with how I handled myself that day. Because after lunch then, mom and I had a bit of an outing to ourselves, and it was very nice. And this is exactly what I mean. I have all these moments and episodes where it’s fucking tough to get out of the ditch I probably dug myself into. But each and every time, no matter how long it took, I found myself functioning and well. Not that that means I’m not unwell, but it just goes to show that as long as I keep moving forward, there will be more moments and episodes. They will be good, bad, better, worse, and nothing at all. The secret is to keep moving forward. Thank goodness for Meet The Robinsons.
All that said, I want to restate that I don’t believe in censorship. Especially the kind that is designated to push an agenda that is old and tired. People are smarter than to believe bullshit, and in fact, given the right time and resources, people do find out for themselves what they need to know. That’s why you need to present all the information so that they can choose for themselves what to believe. Yes, the media is shit. But that doesn’t mean you make up stuff as you go along. You give all the resources to the people so they can figure it out themselves. That’s the solution to your problem. And that is why I will not be sharing these posts to my Facebook. I’ve avoided it because I didn’t necessarily want to reveal this part of me to people in my life that will probably not understand. But that’s okay. If they want to talk about it, I’m a DM away. That’s preferable btw, because I don’t like talking about stuff in person. It scares me like the coward that I am.
There’s plenty of other stuff to talk about. I will keep you posted. Happy Monday.
PS: at the end of the day, whether or not you wear the hijabs or the pussyhats, as long as you believe in and fight for equality, you are a feminist.
Some captions attached to the image that I feel is relevant:
- “I went to the march in Augusta, Maine,” Abigail Gray Swartz, the artist behind next week’s cover, said. “I marched for all those who need our support, for equality and diversity. [x]
- The “pussyhat” made its appearance around the country at the Women’s Marches of January 21st. (New Yorker writers discussed the humor of the protests, the radical possibility they represented, and the togetherness of the event).Abigail Gray Swartz, who marched in her state capital of Augusta, Maine, was inspired by the spirit of the day to paint “Rosie the Riveter,” wearing a knitted pink cap. “I marched for my three-year-old son and for my six-year-old daughter,” the artist said. “Even though I couldn’t take them with me, I was there for them.” [x]
I update every Monday-Wednesday-Friday-(and sometimes)Sunday night! I’m always present on social media, @thcynicalnerd on Instagram and Tumblr, @nerdTHEcynical on Twitter and Snapchat 🙂