Monotony.

For some reason, though I really must stop being sporadic and follow my writing schedule, I want to write today but have zero motivation to go through my topic list. So this is going to be a nice little shitpost about cynical thoughts. Shall we make that a segment?

(from http://ineffablescribbles.tumblr.com/post/28966889176/same-old-same-old // credits to the creator)

Have I mentioned how broke I am? Still in-between jobs, currently waiting for one that’s taking its sweet, sweet time, and the list of things that I want/need to buy is just growing. That being said, I hardly ever buy stuff anyway. I might go window shopping (with money) and see stuff that I might like or find cute, but I wouldn’t buy them. (1) Because I wouldn’t have anywhere to put them, and (2) do I really even need them? Unless I do go out of my way to buy a certain thing because I would like to pursue a certain thing related to it, which are usually gadgets, shoes, bags, BOOKS, and more gadgets.

That being said, in the back of my mind, whenever I decide to buy something, I try to keep in mind where I’m going to be storing it, how long I would be using it, and when disposing of it, how harmful would it be for the environment? Technically, almost all waste is bad for mother earth, so I try not to buy something unless absolutely necessary. Operative word being “try”, because I don’t really have money to buy stuff, and when I do, I usually fail. I’m getting there, though, because more than anyone, I know how much I hate having to clean my room of too much clutter, and ending up throwing away too much. In the back of my mind, I know it’s gonna end up in a dumpsite somewhere to be burned or salvaged by much less fortunate people.

You would think that with technology developing and progressing as fast as it is/does, someone would have figured out a better, more sustainable way to recycle/dispose of things. But nah, I mean, one of the most powerful countries in the world just lessened their budget for their environment agency to basically nothing, and even less for the arts, so there goes any creative/scientific way of figuring that out. Great job, assholes.

Which reminds me of when mom and I were window shopping, around furniture and house stuff. She said, “If only we had the time for this stuff.” I replied, “Don’t you mean money?” “Nah, if we had the time, we could make this stuff ourselves.” “Yeah, but what about the stuff we’re gonna make it with? Still need to buy those.” Basically chicken/egg shit. And I really don’t wanna be too philosophical about it (or anything, really).

(*This was gonna be a morose shitpost, and afternoon me was just not up for that, so I changed it. You’re welcome. So instead of the paragraph I wrote earlier, we’re gonna turn this sad clown frown upside down. Cos no one likes sad clowns. Or clowns in general, they creepy.)

I’ve been saying this a lot recently, that Facebook is toxic. I mean, I follow pretty good pages, and they used to motivate me to spread the word and do shit about it. But sharing it doesn’t even guarantee that everyone does. One of the reasons I started this blog, tbh. I actually have a post about organizations that I want to promote, because they do good stuff. And it just disheartens me when I post a selfie, a cute gif, or a nerdy reference, people line up to like and share it. But when it’s relevant, and actually deserves all the attention, which is the majority of the shit I share, they just get ignored. And my goodness, it just weakens my faith in humanity.

It’s a great (as in big and impressive) task to remind myself that lots of good things happen everyday, and they hardly ever get the attention they deserve. And it’s true. Lots of people create and innovate, and I hope they keep doing so till the day they die. So they can defund all the important organizations they want and discredit the truth for their fake news and alternative facts. Because love is free.

It honestly doesn’t matter if they think they have any say in what women do and say, if they prefer to dehumanize others just because of who we choose to be and who we choose to love, if they kill everyone else who doesn’t look like them, or if they keep their bigoted, misogynist, racist, xenophobe, hypocritical, moronic self. I look forward to the day they die out, but better yet… I look forward to the day they change their mind. Have a conversation, and actually listen. Because it is so much bigger than them, it’s about the goodness we want to leave in this world, for posterity. Not because of our legacy, but so that anyone in the future can enjoy this world just as much as we do/want to.

Sincerely sick of being helpless. Gonna start moving tomorrow. Happy humpday.


Btw, I followed up on my accumulated vlogbrothers videos today, and I learned a substantial amount of things:

My Information Diet (with John) – I actually relate to this video a lot
I Disagree with Me (Thoughts from Lake Powell) (with Hank) – very interesting internal conflict
Why Can’t America Have a Grown-Up Healthcare Conversation (with John) – so relevant right now, highly recommend

I update every Monday-Wednesday-Friday-(and sometimes)Sunday night! I’m always present on social media, @thcynicalnerd on Instagram and Tumblr, @nerdTHEcynical on Twitter and Snapchat 🙂

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