Three things I shouldn’t be without.

Before anything else, if you haven’t yet seen Wonder Woman, starring Gal Gadot, directed by Patty Jenkins, prior to reading this blog post, shame on you and you should. Oh, this one doesn’t have spoilers for it, you really should just watch it. It’s aw-freaking-some.I recently acquired a fidget cube. I knew I needed one the moment they announced them, but there were instances a while back where I just needed to have something in my hand. I ran errands to some banks that didn’t allow cellphone use inside, so I couldn’t distract myself. There are moments when my faulty heart palpitates and I need an external manifestation of the occurring internal rush. Some nights I just pass out with my phone in my hand because my brain needs to be occupied with thoughtless thoughts so that I don’t think about thoughtful ones. But really, the bank incidents were the ones that prompted that desperate search for the fidget cube. The bureaucracy and the monotony and the facade of it all just grated on my nerves, and I needed to expend that frustration towards something virtually harmless.

Since fidget spinners are a bit more popular right now than the cubes, I wanted them even more. I have this… not really an idea, but a habit, I guess, of avoiding popular things. Unless that popular thing is something I absolutely love. But still I’m put off just a tiny bit when people are all over it. Basically that little girl in the sandbox that doesn’t want to share.

On the other hand, literally, because I tend to hold the cube in one hand and on the other, I have my phone. Typical millennial, right? But it’s just the most efficient, most practical, most convenient thing one can have. That’s why you should invest on a good one, especially since companies aim to compete with the great ones by amping up their prices. I can do everything on my phone and then some. I really shouldn’t have an excuse to be bored. And when I need distracting, I have the power of the internet (slow it may be due to dumb third world telcos), ebooks, games, music, and podcasts. In fact, I’m writing this post on my phone right now, and it’s noteworthy because even though I’ve always had the option to, there’s nothing like a keyboard underneath your hands. However, should I feel the need or get inspired to write, I also have the option to do it on my phone. Technology is freaking awesome.

Really, though, I can hardly function without a cup of coffee. And by coffee, I mean a mix of milk, chocolate, and coffee. In a tall mug. Anyone that says they’re not a coffee person has never had to drink it to feel alive. There are days when I don’t have a cup in the morning, and it’s usually such an unproductive day, I end up feeling sick physically, mentally, and emotionally. I hate to use it as a crutch, but that’s essentially what it is. Some people smoke, party, drink alcoholic beverages, do drugs, but my vice is coffee.

Those are three things I shouldn’t be without, because if I am, I usually end up grasping for them, not functioning very well. But to be fair, I think I should enumerate three things I could do much better without, too.

I’ve mentioned this in a few blog posts, but I’ve been avoiding social media, particularly Facebook. And though I still use it once or twice a day, it’s so much less than how much time I used to spend on it. And it really has helped. There’s just much too much that trigger me into frustration and depression on it, mostly because people tend to be conveniently selective of the issues they’re sympathetic to. Hardly do I see someone genuinely empathetic to a cause, and that’s not for lack of trying on my part because I constantly share information and posts about the causes that I support, and they don’t get as much attention as, say, my new selfie or a watch I just bought. Granted, maybe I shouldn’t be posting just material things—or maybe, I should use those images to talk about important significant relevant things in the caption. Needless to say, I don’t put random quotes and phrases in my pics, but—and this just came to me—I think I’ll be linking and promoting pages, organizations, and groups in them from now on. That would be a way to turn something neutral into something they’ll have to pay attention to.

Having grown up in my circumstances, I have a sensitivity to fake af people. Even just slightly shady, I will detect and muster up just enough energy to stop myself from rolling my eyes. I think that’s why I’m so good at pretending I’m good at things (or just good in general), because my environment and exposure taught me well. You know what they say, experience is the best teacher. I like to think I’m so good at pretending that I can actually fake being okay with people being fake, but my internal morals integrity convictions decency actually pushes back, and so it’s an effort not to punch people in the face when they’re being pretentious. I will never understand why people insist on pretending. There is a legitimate goodness in the world when people show their true selves, but instead they’re forced to squeeze themselves in a box simply because of other fake people. I need none of that.

I should really come up with a term for this next one, because it just encapsulates ignorant, stupid morons that have somehow aged up to be a grown ass adult that doesn’t know that problems have particular solutions, and still support another ignorant, stupid moron that was fortunate enough to be privileged and capable but somehow eluded a quality education. Granted, it’s not limited to just supporters of that ignorant, stupid moron, but just ignorant, stupid morons in general. I cannot, for the life of me, comprehend understand rationalize why, in the age of technological advancements and availability of information, ignorant, stupid morons aren’t extinct yet. You know who are, if not endangered, extinct? Countless animals and species due to deforestation, climate change, and global warming, which ignorant, stupid morons either conveniently select or deny. Not for lack of awareness or education, but because they infringe on their traditional beliefs, or because they believe the, ironically, fake news that other supporters of that ignorant, stupid moron share.

These three latter things are almost enough to make me wish so hard for humanity to just end, because this much bad is much too much for the good to overcome. Almost. But having watched Wonder Woman, starring Gal Gadot, directed by Patty Jenkins (I just love saying that entire phrase) twice this weekend, “humanity is all that you say, but so much more.”

Therefore, I will devour that tall mug of coffee, and hold my fidget cube and my phone in my hand, and face all the ignorant, stupid morons with my millennial head held high.  So should you.

Happy Monday.


I update every Monday-Wednesday-Friday-(and sometimes)Sunday night! I’m always present on social media, @thcynicalnerd on Instagram and Tumblr, @nerdTHEcynical on Twitter and Snapchat 🙂

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