Smelling the roses.

Hello! How are you? I’m doing just fine, thanks for asking. Thankfully episode-free for the last few days, or… I mean I didn’t take note if there were. There probably was at least one, but I’m pretty sick of being sick so I just try to move past it. Here’s me trying to move past it!

butterfly(from http://saepiae.tumblr.com/post/162022848632/butterfly // credits to the creator)

I didn’t accomplish most of the things I listen on the previous post, but that doesn’t surprise me at all. I’ll try better this week. I have been catching up on vlogbrothers videos. As I’ve mentioned before, I like to wait a while and not catch up to the latest one, because that way I have some to watch when I desperately need it. I usually end up being more productive during days that I do, so I leave it for when I’ve been so lazy it makes me want to puke.

Not to say that I haven’t been doing anything these last few days. I’ve progressed in DA: I, but of course as a devout delayer of things, I’m taking my sweet ass time. Nothing wrong with that, I don’t think. After all people can walk as slowly as they want on the sidewalk, and I can’t complain about it. I just have to overtake them, which would be easier if they didn’t take up the entire width of the way. Okay, rant over. So yeah, DA: I, and started rereading one of my favorite books, Receiver of Many by Rachel Alexander. It’s an absolute gem, and I started reading it when it was just a short story on FictionPress. I remember waiting days and weeks and months for a new update, and each one was as worth the wait as the next. I wish I could have supported Ms. Alexander when she was crowd-sourcing for the book, but I was still insanely happy when I was finally able to buy the ebooks. Of course, I’ll be looking to buy the physical books next. Say what you will about online writing, but there are really great talents out there that just deserve the chance to shine, and this book, and the ones after it, shines pretty bright. Very much recommend.

That being said, I haven’t done most of the things that I have to do. Like study for that upcoming exam, look up basic driving stuff, or even inquire about that Spanish school. I really must get around to doing it, especially considering that I don’t do much in the day anyway. I do think that there isn’t anything wrong with taking my time, though. Because everyone does it. And if they don’t, they ought to. Carpe diem, we should take in the scenery while we’re here. I like playing my video games. I like reading my book (rereading, too). I like making a tall cup of coffee-choco and drinking it throughout the day. I like pausing and petting and playing with my dogs and my cat. Not everyone gets to do this, definitely, but that’s all the more reason to do it as much as I can.

So a couple of vlogbrothers catch-up in, I come across this one, and it’s as real as it gets. Another recommend. In the description, Hank says,

“I’m just a little sick of people feeling like they’ve failed or like they don’t matter because they aren’t hitting every single target society puts in front of them. No one does that. And a lot of those goals are dumb anyway. I know that society thrives on driven people, and I hope you are driven to achieve, and that a lot of that drive comes from not necessarily healthy desires. But I think we can make the world a better place without putting all of this fucked up pressure on ourselves.”

There’s no use in beating ourselves up for not being able to do what everybody else can. Everybody else is beating themselves up, too, and it’s not just unfair, it’s also a waste of time. While we do have that time, we could be looking inward, or backward, or sideward. Just know that whichever way you go, I can assure you that it is forward. Slowly but surely.

Happy humpday.


PS: I legitimately tried to look for some damn roses, but alas, you don’t get points for trying. Or do you…?

I [try to] update every Monday-Wednesday-Friday-(and sometimes)Sunday night! I’m always present on social media, @thecynicalnerd on Instagram and Tumblr, @nerdTHEcynical on Twitter and Snapchat 🙂

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